Sunday, January 29, 2012

I Don't Have Writers Block; I have Writers Jam

I get so many comments that I should write more.  Perhaps write a book.  Yet I hardly ever write a thing except for quirky status's.
  It's not that I am shy with my words.  *cough* Forgive me, I almost choked on the very thought of that one.  It's not that have nothing to say.  (I will refrain from choking on that one) My problem is making a choice on what to write about.
  This is probably the first thing in years that I have thought of and stuck with for several days.  I would write about not having writers block, but  having a traffic jam of ideas all vying for top spot.
  I have romance stories, flowing though my brain and my heart.  I see him see her.  I see her too blinded by pain from her past to see him.  I see him being gentle and patient with her, slowly pulling her out of the depths of her own personal bottomless pit.  (Oh shut up! Y'all know you would read it and love it!)   I have mysteries: After the death of her parents, a letter is found that describes a brother she never knew she had.  A child stolen from her mothers arms by a rich and powerful family of political climbers. *blank look*.  Oooohhhh... I have a great self help book to help those who just never know what to say at the right time: "How to tell a butt-head off in 30 seconds or less".  Advice from a hairstylist: What NOT to say to the person about to pick up sharp pointy shears and have them close to your head".  And... Advice from an ex-wife on how to train your kids to be serial killers simply by using them as a pawn in a game of "I hate you more" with your ex.
  See?  Idea after idea.  But I can not settle on just one.  One thought leads to another and by the time I think I am going to start something, I have run out of time and have to dash to go do what I was supposed to be doing in the first place.
  I feel like the Queen of ADHD.  My mind is a constant whirlwind of thoughts, dreams and ideas.  But it is like I can double think.  Part of my brain is going non stop, and the other part gets so worn out at times I just want to sit down and cry.  
  As of late its been recommended to me that I try yoga. Apparently it can help me realign my spine and hips AND help me calm my mind. To be honest  I am really afraid of going to a yoga class, not because I wont be able to do it, but I am afraid I will get kicked out because I have to bite my lips until they almost bleed to keep from yapping constantly. And then I will try another yoga class but I will be banned from that one too because all the Yoga Guru's will have put me on the "Wont shut up" list.
  OK, maybe that is going a tad far, but hello? that's how my brain works!
  So short story long, (and yes, I said that right) each week I try and try to settle on a blog to write.. It feels so good to get some of these thoughts and ideas out of my head.
  For about 10 mins after I publish this, I will have some calm quiet in my head.  Then, it will start all over again.  So I am going to pour me a cup of coffee and enjoy that rare quiet time...
  Until I see you again..
  MB

Sunday, January 15, 2012

My life as a Professional Hairfluffer...

I was thinking (imagine THAT!) at work about some of the things we as hairstylists face in an average day.  I thought that after 20+ years of making people look good, (and refraining from strangling some of them) I would start a blog that I could add to as things happen, or as I remember stuff.  Things to make you laugh, or cry... and things I have wanted to say but would have gotten fired if I had.  *blink*  You must remember that I am a "problem solver" and tend to attract anyone who is a tad different (aka: crazy as hell) so some of these stories will seem made up.. but I have witnesses. *wink*
  To break things down, I will call the client CL and myself MB (of course)...*fluttering eyelashes*


One of my most recent memories is of a  young lady who sat in my chair and said:
CL:  MB, now-- I wants to keep my lenththasis. 
MB:  *blink* Length.  You want to keep your length. 
CL: *looks at me confused*  That's what I said..
MB:  No, you said lenththasis... length is plural.. well its assumed plural regardless...
CL:  *looks at me really confused* what?
MB:  Never mind..


I have to give Angela Lonier 5 stars/snaps for this one.  Apparently she had a difficult client today... I swiped this from her Facebook page...
  "ok people. If you want your hair to do something specific but you dont wanna cut it. I can't help you. If you don't wanna style your hair to get what you want, I can't help you. You needto talk to God about why you don't have magic hair that will surpass all physics and just do what you want with that stuff you call hair to do. I am a hairstylist not a miracle worker people!!!"

 Yall just dont know what your stylist has been though that day when you sit in their chair! <3 MB



Stay tuned as I add things over time... =)